This one is about life that's happening right now. The symptoms of PTSD nearly destroyed my marriage. In 2020 I had almost made my mind up that we were to separate, we have had problems throughout but have always got through it. I was blaming my husband and his problems, for most of our issues.
Only later in the year, after having a breakdown, and being diagnosed with PTSD did I start to realise the extent of issues I was causing, and how much was my doing.
As our relationship has gone on, I have pushed him further and further away. He is very supportive now we know what’s happening, as he can see I am trying to come back to him.
When we first met, I was already broken, and I didn’t realise just how much I was living with on a daily basis. We formed our love from a bad place, and our intimate relationship has never been easy.
Now through all the tangles of confused emotions, I am learning to love him once again, but slowly, in a way that it is only him in my head, rather than my past fighting against it.
Painted in acrylics on a ¾ inch thick piece of wood. No pre-planning – Using only my hands and brush to manipulate the paint, I let my emotions lead the colours and movements that created this piece.